C_If_You_Are_The_One_(2008)_Fei_cheng_wu_rao ,BR_MKV_H264_AC3[5.1](HuayiBrothers,Chi-Chi,Sub) 1024x434 - 24 FPS
Yes, Mr. Fan
This inventor...
What's his name again?
Qin Fen
Qin as in Qin Dynasty
Fen as in "to struggle"
He's waiting in the living room
Show him to the dining room
Yes, sir
This is Mr. Fan, angel investor
Mr. Qin, inventor of the CRT2008
Shall we speak English
or Chinese?
Your decision
Whichever is more natural
Then let's use our mother tongue
Nice to meet you
Our mother tongue?
Oops. Look at me
So used to English, I forgot my own language
So nice to meet you
A pleasure
Sit down
Sir, please
Give me the specifics
This invention of yours...
what inspired it?
The root of the world's endless wars
and escalating conflicts
is our inability
to judge disputes impartially
Continue
As children, we all played a game:
Rock, paper, scissors
You've played it?
Uh-huh
It's our most primal and effective
conflict resolution method
So, why, as adults
have we discarded this method?
Why?
Two critical flaws:
Hand velocity differential and
last-minute sleight of hand
Sleight of hand
Rock, papers, scissors
A cunning hand
can cheat
The Conflict Resolution Terminal
wipes out both flaws
Hold it here
Stick your hand in
Not your head. Your hand
Let's try it
Rock. Paper. Scissors
Ready?
Yes
Pull it open at the count of three
One
Two
Three
Fascinating
It's cheat-proof
You invented this?
I did
Just imagine
For instance
this beautiful girl here
If we both wanted her, but...
Don't even think about it
It was hypothetical
If we all had Conflict Resolution Terminals
the wars in the Balkans and Middle East
American presidential elections
to elect a white or black President
Win or lose
The tube decides
Super good
The CRT2008 is useful in all aspects of life
It's a revolutionary product
Say no more
This will be a massive high-tech IPO
I'll buy the patent
Name a price
Two million
One million
Two million
One million
Let's do this
Let the CRT2008 decide
Good idea
Rock. Paper. Scissors
Ready? Yes
One. Two. Three
Resolved
You got yourself a deal
I meant US dollars
Huh. I meant Sterling
Marriage Personal
Looking for hot guys? Don't bother
No gold-diggers either
To avoid mutual disappointment
PhD's need not reply
Women entrepreneurs need not reply
Parentheses: tradeswomen and peddlers excepted
Perfect men like Andy Lau and Tom Cruise
won't be seeking you here
Nor do I expect to find Julia Roberts
Even if you were a goddess
I couldn't handle you
I'm not expecting a cover-girl
to blow me away with your beauty
Just a sane, healthy woman
Modern on the outside
traditional on the inside
Slightly demure would be ideal
Don't be too complicated
Don't be too young
Proficiency in folding laundry a plus
Preferably pressed and folded
like they just came off the store shelf
Am I being specific?
Let me introduce myself
I'm no longer young
Solidly middle-class
Smoke, but don't drink
Went abroad to study
Lived overseas for a decade
Never really studied much
I slacked and learned a few survival skills
I've returned without accomplishment
Truthfully
I'm what they call
a "Three Strikes" returnee:
No company. No stocks. No degree
Morally, I'm about 50-50
I'm no angel
just too cowardly to do wrong
All in all, I'd classify myself as
a constructive member of society
If interested, please call
I hope you're the one
Shan-shan
May I join you?
I'm expecting someone
You haven't changed much
Still handsome
You got the wrong guy
I'm Jianguo
From the construction company
I changed that much?
You don't recognize me?
Hey
From administration
Transferred from the army arts troupe
I was in logistics
Anyway, in charge of entertainment
Back then, you were a cute little boy
I remember you had single eyelids
How'd they get doubled?
Had them done in Korea
Gee, what a coincidence
Run into each other ten years later
What coincidence?
I made a date with you
A date with me?
Uh
Ai Moli
Molly
Like the name of this restaurant
I changed my name
I wanted to surprise you
Trying to get in my way?
My ad was for a marriage partner
I wanted to see you
Besides
you didn't write
"No men wanted"
Of course I didn't
Why would I seek a man?
I'm not gay
You're...
Yes
Huh?
But I'm not
How do you know?
I used to think so too
But later I realized
I just lacked the courage to face it
Do you remember
the labor union field trip to Shi Du?
My leg cramped
when I was swimming
You rescued me
That's right
I held onto you tightly
You kept comforting me
Every since then, I felt
so safe with you
When I don't see you
I want to...
Hey-hey-hey
You
are ahead of the curve
But I
am not that enlightened yet
Then why have you not married yet?
Haven't found the right one
Give me a break
Perhaps, subconsciously you dislike women
Oh... No-no-no
Do you think I'm strange?
No
Absolutely not
I constantly ask myself:
Why am I so narrow-minded?
With such a big heart
why can't I make room for a man?
Each time I clear a woman out
guess what happens next?
Another woman fills in the space
Let me ask you something
Suppose
I were like you
I said "suppose"
Don't be angry if I get this wrong
You're bad
Forget it. I better shut up
I know what you want to say
Deep down
you're like my big brother
It's probably better that way
Brother
Yes?
You have great skin
So white
What's your first impression of me?
Much as I expected
Frankly
looks aren't important
It's the inside that counts
Someone kind, and good to his parents
Even if I didn't like you
I'm sure you'll find a good wife
You really are a modern-traditional woman
A rare catch
Your parents still in good health?
My father passed away last year
My mother is still alive
I came back, so she wouldn't be alone
How old is she?
In her seventies
Your father...
Where is he buried?
At Eight Treasure Mountain
His urn is in the ossuary
Your mother is getting old
A filial son should give his parents
a good resting place
Old people are fussy about final resting places
Don't you worry
I would never deprive them
A man should be responsible
and filial
Even if he doesn't make much money
he provides for his parents' needs
Now that's a reliable man
Tell the truth
Are you such a man?
I think I am
No, you're not
You keep your father's ashes in a tiny box
And how about when your mother dies?
Going to squeeze them both
into a little box?
Not even enough room for incense
and ghost money at Grave Sweeping Festival
You call that filial?
Then, I'll buy them a cemetery plot
It's not that I can't afford it
Just that when I left China
only national heroes could afford a grave
Normal folk's ashes were kept on shelves
Don't worry
You find a spot with a nice view
I'll take care of it immediately
If you and I get along
I'll have your tombstone carved in advance
No way you'll be stored on a shelf
It really is a great investment
Just thirty thousand yuan gets you
a grave plot with imperial fengshui
Thirty thousand
Price of a return trip to America
In just a few years, the same plot
will be worth three hundred thousand
By the time you sell it
you'll have made 1000% profit
Hold on
If I sell it
where will my parents go?
You can buy two
If you buy two plots, my company
will give you a 5% discount
Miss Liang?
Yes
I'm Qin Fen
Sorry, I was late
Have a seat
I never expected...
What?
Nothing
What's your line of work?
I'm a flight attendant
Which airline?
Hainan Airline
How would you grade yourself?
Six
Only six?
I'd give you a Nine
You've met a few already?
You mean these personals?
Uh
You're the first
Oh
Myself, I've met a couple
You're the first as beautiful as you
This one girl wasn't bad
But she was selling grave plots
She doesn't count
The rest were critically unkosher
Did you buy?
Huh?
The grave plots
Yes
She sweet-talked me
Called me a filial son
If I didn't buy, I'd ruin my reputation
No wife, but got myself a grave
I read your marriage ad.
I think you're very funny
Not like the others, so full of themselves
Or who write a load of sentimental crap
It's disgusting
I'll be totally honest with you
And I'm not trying to flatter you
But judging by your looks
I'd rank you at the "goddess" level
You must have high standards
You're not selling airplanes, are you?
Graves are one thing
But I can't afford airplanes
Why "no women entrepreneurs"?
They're too practical
I prefer more emotional types
What's wrong with being practical?
These days, most people are practical
My mom and friends all advise me
to be more practical
That's why I'm here meeting you
To learn to be more practical
Then you got the wrong guy
I'm definitely not the type you're seeking
How do you know my type?
I don't even know what type is
Being here seems so unreal
But I did telephone you
I'm the one who asked you out
You mean you're not serious
You were confused and regret meeting me
A little
Don't be mad
It's not because of you
I think I'm a bit ridiculous
Then we should stop here
It's good we're direct. Simpler
We won't waste each other's time
You busy?
Not at all
But we don't have any hope
Then, go ahead
I'll sit here awhile
Okay
See you later, then
Good-bye Wait, that's not right
We won't see each other again
In that case...
"Farewell" isn't correct either
You really are a pain
What we mean is...
See you never
Hey
Feel like a drink?
We can go somewhere nearby
and chat a little more
Why?
Chat about what?
You a shill for a restaurant
posing as a lonely woman?
Enough, already
I didn't suspect you of a crime
So, don't be suspicious of me
In truth, I am a criminal
I was worried you weren't
You drink like a wimp
It won't kill you
Drink up. No one's stopping you
Keep talking
Heard of "love at first sight"?
I loved the first sight of you
We're not even "love at third sight"
Love at first sight doesn't mean
I fall for you when I see you
Or that you fall for me
It's not about sight
But smell
The other person's scent attracts you
Enchants you
Some people are made for each other
So, two strangers rush up
and sniff each other up and down?
Is that possible?
It's not like that
If you're made for each other
you'd sense each other from far away
Ever watch "Animal Planet"?
Yes
Even from dozens of miles away
animals can sense each other
People are just like animals
Are you only attracted by one smell?
Animals don't fixate on just one lover
or type
It's a mutual thing
It's not just attraction, but
a kind of infatuation
Anything else repels you
Then why come all this way to bother me?
Infatuated, but you can't be together
You struggle to break free from it
You're torn apart by heartache
You drink yourself to sleep each night
The man has a family
He loves you, but can't marry you
Your parents don't know
It hurts, but you can't share it
I can't tell anyone
Then why tell me?
I couldn't take it anymore
I was hurt too badly
Anyway, I won't see you again
Who cares what you think of me
Then I should charge a fee
He has all the fun
and I get a miserable woman
Since when are we best buddies?
Take as much as you want
But I'm paying you to drink up
You can't just sip
I really can't drink
I'll accompany you for free
So, don't drink
I told you one of my secrets
You should also tell me something
you can't admit to anyone else
Then we'll be even
Why are you so complicated?
Fine, don't tell me
I don't care, anyway
Let it rot in your stomach
And I thought you were a big man
Based on what you've got
dare you ask for a sentimental woman
We won't see each other again?
Nope
Know why I don't drink?
Aren't you drinking now?
A friend and I ran a travel agency in America
We specialized in Chinese groups
Once, we had a government tour group
Led by a bureau director
A very juicy gig
There was a woman named Xiaobai
A translator
Pretty. The quiet type
I had her in my sights the moment they landed
During the trip
I started to fall for her
Later on
we, you know...
What?
We, uh...
got intimate
Afterwards, she cried
Wanted me to help her stay in America
I agreed without a second thought
I really liked her
Besides, it was easy for me
The next day I told my friend
that I was with Xiaobai
I asked him to help me
keep Xiaobai in America
He freaked out
Said, Absolutely not
We'd got the job because of
his connection with the bureau director
If they left someone behind
the director would be disciplined
Besides screwing the director
it could also kill our business
If I insisted on her staying
I think my friend would killed me
So, you two sold her out
Let me finish
I had to beg my friend
I'd make sure she didn't run for it
But he had to promise not to report her
When we saw them off at the airport
Xiaobai just stared at me
With eyes like daggers
Couldn't even look at her
I was so ashamed
That's your secret?
This year
the director heard I was back
He invited us to dinner
The people from the tour group came too
Only person missing was Xiaobai
I made a lot of small talk
then casually asked about Xiaobai
They said, You don't know?
Soon after she returned, she killed herself
My head just exploded
I asked, What happened?
He said
Her husband was abusive
Beat her all the time
She kept trying to divorce him
She'd planned to stay in America
But she failed
Even got reported
She returned completely hopeless
So, I asked my friend
if he'd reported her
He said, Yes
Said he couldn't trust me
So he told the director
That day
I beat up my friend
I drank a lot
Until finally
I was sprawling on the floor
grabbing people's legs and crying
Why'd you beat him?
You're the one who killed her
You're despicable
After that day
every time I drink, I remember her
Later, I just quit drinking
But you had to make me drink
and spill my rotten guts
We even?
Now you know what I'm made of
You can go now
Leave
So, if we get married
I have to go live with your family?
Can I refuse?
There's something you need to know
What?
My aunt has a bad memory
How bad?
She can remember today's events
By tomorrow, it's all gone
Is your home far?
How do I get there?
First you fly to Kunming
Then a day's bus ride to Mengzi
Then another bus to Pingbian
Then a day by tractor
Another day by ox cart
and you're home
She can't remember things
And people?
Nope
Not even people?
But she writes all important events
and people in her notebook
If you two marry
she'll read it every morning
and recall who you are
Qin Fen
You're tired already?
Keep playing
If it doesn't work out
Can we divorce?
My big brother will break your legs
Sister
Don't record that
Best to forget what happened today
What we're talking about?
You like it here in Haikou?
It's great
Sunny, no pollution, tropical
I've been here two years
I play golf, swim, dive
Never felt healthier
Gotta take care of yourself
Uh
How are the blind dates?
Still blind
Let me fix you up
Yes For real
A really good person
If I weren't married
I'd marry her myself
I used to be married
My husband passed away
When?
Just recently
How long were you together?
Is this...
very important to you?
Of course
If you were deeply in love
After all, his bones are barely cold yet
Seven or eight years
You must be hurting
Compared to before
I feel much better now
These past five years
didn't even know where he slept at night
I finally know where he is
You found him a spot
Yanchun Ridge Cemetery
Whenever I need him, he's there
If he runs away now
you should get your money back
How old are you?
Fifty?
No
Forty-something
I look older, don't I?
That's okay
I like older men
How's your health?
On the weak side
That's great
Don't bother exercising
If you get sick, I'll nurse you
You don't want a strong
healthy body?
You prefer a soft marshmallow?
Soft marshmallows taste better
An old, sickly guy
You're not worried about marriage quality?
At your age...
Let me be frank
You're at your sexual peak
You believe the foundation for love is sex?
Not entirely
But love without sex
is not love
That would be friendship
I don't agree
What's wrong with no sex?
Many people grow old together without it
I don't mean to imply
no sex at all
Just
not too frequently
Tell me
What's your idea of
"not too frequently"?
Ideally speaking...
Yes?
Once a month?
Once a year
If you agree
we can meet again
I don't agree
I know why your husband never came home
If we got married
I'd be hard to find too
A real pity
Is sex really all that interesting?
Oh, yeah
Sorry, I couldn't answer just now
Smiley
Please don't get angry, but...
My wife and I
will be on the same flight as you
Can't you change your ticket?
I just found out
She booked it ages ago
I never expected it would be your flight
You know I care about you
I have to attend my brother's wedding
I just hope you can
make sure she doesn't see you
It would be better
How should I do that?
It's an airplane cabin
and you're seated in first class
Where should I hide myself?
You can't treat me like this
Welcome to Grand China Air
Boarding pass, please
Smiley Liang
It really is you
Old foes meet again
Please take your seat
and don't block the aisle
Welcome to Grand China Air
Hello. This way, please
Welcome to Grand China Air
Boarding pass, please
This way on the left
Thank you
Welcome to Grand China Air
Boarding pass, please
This way, sir
Please hurry and take your seat
Sir, as soon as possible
We're about to close the door
Please sign this
Here
I'll sign it
Thank you
Hi, I'll get that for you
Please take your seat
Hot towel
Something to drink?
Miss?
If there is an empty seat
I'd like to sit with my husband
Sorry
First class is full today
But I'd be happy to look in economy
My husband and I booked this flight
Why aren't we seated together?
Next time you can arrive earlier
to have your boarding passes changed
The computer doesn't know
you're husband and wife
I'll switch with you
No one should split up a married couple
Young comrade
I know you're not responsible for ticketing
But you should listen to customer feedback
and submit our suggestions to your superiors
The key to improving customer service
is paying attention to details
Please, sir. C'mon
No point in troubling you
It's a short flight
We're about to take off
If you're going to switch seats
please do it soon
It's no trouble
I'm already up. Go ahead
Please
Thank you
Please fasten your seat belts Thank you
Ladies and gentlemen
we'll be taking off shortly
To ensure your safety, please check
that your seat belts are fastened
and that all cell phones are turned off
Thank you
We're already taxiing
Whatever it is, can wait
Just wanted to remind you
for your own safety
to fasten your seat belt
So, that gentleman is the little runt
you can't live without?
Please don't interrupt my work
Some things just aren't meant to be
I'll be in Hangzhou for a few days
If you're flying to Beijing
call me if you feel like a drink
I can be your non-fatal drinking buddy
When outsiders imagine Hangzhou
they often think of West Lake
What they don't know is that
a mere 5 kilometers away
is a rare environmental treasure
Here is China's first wetlands national park:
West Brook Wetlands
An exiled Song Dynasty emperor
happened upon these wetlands
Like me, he was enchanted
He wanted to build his temporary palace here
But due to lack of funds
the project was abandoned
The night before he had to leave
the Emperor said:
West Brook, may you remain here
And thus it earned its eternal name
The home we're seeing today
is in Remain Here Town
I trust you'll want to stay too
The Emperor would have stayed
But he was broke
All that remained were his words
But I've brought cash
If I like the place
my whole life will remain here
This is your foyer
Your living room
Your master bedroom
And this is your private pond
Hey, take it easy
Stop saying "your" living room, "your" bedroom
"your" private pond
I don't know if I'm buying yet
I'm sure you've seen better homes
But no amount of money could
buy an environment like this
Hello?
I was in a lousy mood yesterday
So I took a day off and stayed in Hangzhou
Drank half a bottle of wine to get to sleep
Slept in the whole morning
Woke up not knowing what to do
If you're not busy
care to join me for a chat?
That's fine, but
I've got another blind date
You came all the way to Hangzhou?
Really casting a wide net
Can't leave any stone unturned
Better to kill a thousand innocents
than set one guilty person free
Well, I'm not busy
Take me along. I'll consult for you
How should I introduce you?
Say we already dated
but you rejected me?
Say we're drinking buddies
Or, don't introduce me at all
I'll just sit nearby and drink tea
I'll advise you afterwards
I won't get in your way
Sounds good
But I'm warning you:
If I find a suitable match
if we dig each other's smell
you're not my responsibility
Don't call me a fair-weather friend
Relax
If that happens
I'll be overjoyed for you
See you
Hey, miss
How much does this place cost?
Don't mind me
You are not from here
I'm Taiwanese
My father owns a factory in Hangzhou
We're here for the time being
Ever been to Beijing?
Of course
Which do you prefer?
That's a difficult question
For weather and living environment
Hangzhou, of course
But I quite like Beijingers
My grandfather is from Beijing
I love hearing his accent
What is go-ING on'?
The accent is the last word
Not the first word
What is going ON'
What is going on'
Later on
my grandfather went to Taiwan with the Nationalists
after the Mainland had fallen
Hold on there
We call it "liberated"
You say "fallen"
we say "liberated"
Liberated?
What does "liberated" mean?
Liberated
I get it
The difference between liberated and fallen
is just one's point-of-view
Right, that's it
We can agree to disagree
Exactly
There are some universal values
For instance
compassion is to love all beings
After the recent earthquake
Taiwanese all rushed to provide relief
Mainland Chinese were very moved
My father's company donated too
It pained us to see fellow Chinese suffering
Especially children who lost their parents
Poor things
There was a dying mother on the news
To her last breath, she breast-fed her child
Even after dying, she was still nursing
Maternal love knows no bounds
A mother can sacrifice anything for her child
Dads too
Even if it wasn't my child
I could adopt one of those orphans
You have such deep love for children?
Yes
If you were an orphan
I'd adopt you too
Idealists really do have bad memories
I told you
my father has a factory here
But don't despair
I have one in my belly
You can be his father
Thought you weren't married?
I'm not
But
I'm pregnant
Whose is it?
Not worth mentioning
He abandoned the darling in my belly
I don't want the child to be fatherless
So
I'm seeking a loving father for him
You're a good candidate
Uh, well
Do you like me?
I like you a lot
but...
You said you didn't care if it was your own
If we don't tell him
and the child only knows you
He would be just like your own
An orphan, I can accept
But with a full set of parents?
You can't just put a Mercedes ornament
on the hood of a BMW
It will still be a good car
But if it breaks down
Mercedes parts won't fit
and BMW won't repair it
We should forget it
I'm flattered you like me
But I'm not the right man
I'll have to bite the bullet
What a perfect opportunity
How could you be so heartless?
Seemed like a great fit
Look
She's beautiful
wealthy
and you get a son for free
For a guy like you
it's like winning the lottery
Normally, I don't mind free lunches
but starting a family
requires self-reliance
No foreign aid accepted
I think
this blind date thing
isn't too kosher for me
I have no appetite for ugly ducklings
but the good-looking ones are
either hiding something or hate sex
Where'd the simple, sane women all go?
Why can't I meet even one?
What are you saying about me?
Think your sane and uncomplicated?
Oh, not you. You're not good-looking
Calling you "good-looking" would be an insult
You're ravishingly beautiful
A rare, precious beauty
If you were royalty you'd be up there with Diana
Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder
But, no exaggeration
even to a foe, you'd be beautiful
Don't hold it in. Laugh
I need to ask you something
I sat with you through your date
Accompany me to meet someone?
I didn't ask you to come
You invited yourself
Will you or won't you?
No
I'm asking you one more time
No
Fine
Good-bye
This is Mr. Qin
You met on the flight
Nice to meet you
Have a seat
Sit here
Excuse us
We'll need some privacy
Okay
Thanks
Mr. Qin and I knew each other before
Just acquaintances
But meeting again on the flight
something sparked between us
Perhaps it was "love at second sight"
After we landed, Mr. Qin called me
He asked me to stay a few more days
to become better acquainted
We've been together the past two days
We feel fortunate to have met again
You're the person closest to me
So I brought him here
to introduce you formally
It's right that you should know
Not going to wish us well?
You always wanted me to have a home
Smiley told me a lot about you
Said you treat her very well
Meeting you on the airplane seemed like fate
You've made your decision?
Mr. Qin
Perhaps you know about
Smiley and me
I'm not as lucky as you
I entrust her to you, good brother
Be good to her
She's stubborn. I spoiled her
Be patient with her
If she's unhappy
I'll be unhappy too
Alright, this scene is over. I can't take it
I'll be leaving now
I know it's difficult for you to meet
Smiley and I are just ordinary friends
You're the only one she cares about
You're the lucky one
She drinks everyday because of you
It could kill her if she keeps it up
I can't go on like this
I'm weak and ashamed
I will use my mind and body
all of me
to do something to make you regret
Stop drinking
Smiley
I have not betrayed you
How could I ever punish you?
You asked me to wait three years
I waited
You won't want me
But I will care about you
until that day we agreed upon
I thought I could love you my whole life
I never thought our time together
could one day end
One, two, three
I stopped drinking
Don't worry. Smiley
Surname Qin
"Qin" as in Emperor Qin
Fen as in "to struggle"
Smiley
I got your text message
"Smiley" as in "smiles hiding knives"
Correct
I called twice
but you didn't answer
Call me
Yeah
At the place we met the first time
I already said it eight times: five o'clock
Yeah, that's right
Be there or be square
Pardon me
I've got two dates
Please don't mind my efficiency
No problem
I'm a stock trader
A real bear market lately
Using my spare time
to find a husband
Once the market turns around
I won't have time
Do you play the stock market?
No
Don't understand it
Seeking a marriage partner is like trading stocks
You have to make your decisions based on
a rational analysis of performance
For instance, the candidate's looks or body figure
Or, his personality and education
Or, his finances and family background
Or
So...
if I were a stock
how would I rate?
Judging from age and looks
you've sunk below your offer price
So, I'm in danger of being delisted?
Not necessarily
Inexperienced traders often buy high
But that's very risky
It's very easy to get trapped
More experienced traders buy low
A stock like you with bad performance
most won't touch you
Few would show interest
Thus you're a low risk
You're already at the bottom
Can't go any lower
So, for a stock like me bought low
would you invest long-term
or just "pump and dump"?
Pump and dump?
Do you have explosive potential?
I'd buy long-term and hold it
What if you held it for a while
but found its performance lacking?
Don't worry
I'm not stupid. I'd diversify
They can't all underperform, right?
No one's that unlucky
Hello?
You're here?
I'm here
I see you
Wait for me
Order whatever you like. It's on me
I feel obligated to warn you:
I'm very risky
Best to keep your distance
If you got stuck with me
I'd be useless and unsightly
Might never be able to get rid of me
As an investment
I'd be subprime
Only a criminal would sell me to you
Let's stop trading for today
I also have another stock to see
at six o'clock
Go ahead and chat with her
The whole market is down right now
But don't jump in blindly
Don't rush it
Wait and see
Did I interrupt anything?
She wasn't interested
Said I'd dropped below my offer price
Poor thing
Old guy on the dating scene
getting his pride injured
Spare me the alligator tears
So
what's up?
I want to become your girlfriend
Which type of girlfriend?
The kind you marry
Why?
You knocked up, too?
I'm not in a mood for joking
I have just one condition
What?
While we're dating or even married
I'll fulfill all the duties of a wife
but you'll allow me to have someone else in my heart
I won't do anything
I'll just keep a space for him in my heart
I might miss him from time to time
But it won't be anything more than that
I'll never contact him
Can you accept this?
Your body is here
but your heart is elsewhere
You can refuse
I know it's unfair
Then, is it okay with you
if my heart is here
but my body occasionally has a fling?
No
Well, what if when your heart drifts away
my heart drifts away too?
Fine
But our bodies are faithful to each other
Come here
Then, I'll need to find someone else too
Otherwise, you'll have one and I won't
I'd be at a huge disadvantage
Then, you agree?
Yes
Will you go with me to Hokkaido?
He and I started there
I'd like to end it there too
Are you bubbling with joy?
Wu Sang
Haven't changed in ten years
Look just like a Hokkaido peasant
Except a bit more devious
This is Smiley
This is the Wu Sang I told you about
Married a Hokkaido wife and never left
Ms. Liang, honored to be of service to you
Thank you
I'll get that
Thanks
This way
Wu Sang
What are those arrows for?
Ms. Liang
you've been here before
You must know why. Tell him
Hey
He asked you a question
What?
Those arrows pointing down
Know what they mean?
Hokkaido gets heavy snow in winter
The arrows point to the road's edge
so drivers don't hit the curb
Ah
I see
Did I say it right?
Yes
You learned that from him, right?
Let's have a good time here
You're my boyfriend now
Let's not mention him
Okay?
I'm not used to it yet
It's like my wallet is full of borrowed money
After I spend it, I'll be in debt
Hey, Wu Sang, stop the car
I need to go worship
Don't know what he's saying
No chance today
Why not?
The temple's closed to the public today
No worshipping for you
Well, talk to him
Tell him we came from China
just for today
Have you done something wrong?
I thought you were atheist
Why so suddenly pious?
I found religion
God sent me such a beautiful wife
I'd be rude not to burn some incense
Hey
I'm not your wife yet
Besides, a Japanese Buddha can't help you
Blasphemy
Buddha has no nationality
Hokkaido is my land of fortune
I'll pray to every Buddha I find here
Go talk to him
Okay, okay
In honor of your incredible luck with Ms. Liang
I'll talk to him for you
Why are we being frisked?
It's the funeral of an influential family
Then, let's get out of here
You kidding?
We can't go now
Stop peeking
Act mournful
Did you really cry?
No laughing
You didn't cry?
I saw you cry too
I tried to keep the tears in
Just couldn't hold them any longer
These Japanese must think we Chinese
are really loyal friends
We're not even family, but
we came all this way to cry our eyes out
Practically forced our way in
Neither of you better piss me off
I'm a mafia guy now
You knew this was a funeral
What are you complaining about?
You just had to go in
You're truly adorable
Excuse me
Which way to Hinanoza Hotel?
Straight ahead
Turn right and you'll see it
Thank you
Very easy to find
It's just up ahead
That says "Four Sisters-What?"
Four Sisters dining bar
How are we going to sleep?
You two in one room
You and I can share a room
Catch up on old times
Cut the pretense
A beauty like her and you want to be in my room?
It's not a pretense
We're not that close yet
I'm not the one she loves
Wishing you a pleasant rest
Thank you
Here, try this
It's fishy
Penetrating
Stimulating
Try it
I'm already over-stimulated
What I need now is numbness
Best part about drinking
is the numbness
Can't drink on an empty stomach
Try these clams
I need to get numb too
If your dreams had not been shattered
I'd never be talking marriage with you
My life's been no easier than yours
How can you allow your girlfriend
to have someone else in her heart?
Why do you like me?
Did I say I liked you?
Be honest
It our basis for being together in the future
My basis for marrying you is that
I can't find anyone more foolish
I'll never be so foolish again
You are incapable
of splitting your heart in half
You're a terrible actor
Your feelings are writ across your face
Here's what I think
You're not over him yet
But once you are
your heart will be whole again
That's why I tolerate you right now
You're a fool, but I'm not
If I learn my lesson and get smart
will it ruin your beautiful plan?
In that case
I'll sell you to the local tribesmen
You'll hunt and fish for the rest of your life
And have a slew of babies
Scorched by the sun, drenched in rain
Half-starving, in tattered clothes
If you try to escape
they'll catch you and beat you
Three tortuous years from now
you'll be an ugly, repulsive, wizened old hag
I'm just getting started
Wanna hear more?
I'm only fooling around with you
because you're pretty
Can you accept that?
You up to it?
In the game of emotional counterfeit
you think you're my match?
I'll bet
you couldn't even tell
if I had eight other women in my heart
I've got nothing to lose
You don't care about me
So, I just take what you're giving away
What are you guys so upset for
Getting on my case
If I didn't say something nasty, she'd never stop
You really are serious
Sit down
Let her go
What a perfect opportunity
After this drink, you should
invite Smiley to the hot spring with you
What friend would do that?
And abandon you here?
Spare me
This time, I'm serious about marrying her
I can't be reckless
She'd never give me her body
before she gave me her heart
But, then
once she gives you her heart
your body is sentenced for life
So, I should enjoy freedom while I can
What do you like about her?
She has a good soul
Oh, please
You like her because she's pretty
What's wrong with that?
I should deprive my children of good genes?
Must I marry someone ugly?
Spend the life trying to escape?
Which of these four is prettiest?
They're all charming
Natsuyo. She's pretty
I say Haruko
Sorry to disturb you
May we come in?
Welcome
Please, come in
So few customers
It's still early
Please, sit
Ask Natsuyo and Haruko to drink with us
I am Natsuyo
And that's Haruko
She is Akimi
I am Akimi
And Yukie
And the photo outside?
That photo was taken forty years ago
Oh, really?
We were famous in Tokyo
We were "The Four Seasons"
You suckers fell for it
We stayed together all these years
Aren't we beautiful?
Very beautiful
Now I get it
Where are the Four Sisters?
They're here
She is Natsuyo
Haruko, the one you like, is singing
All old ladies?
They took that photo forty years ago
They used to be famous
They retired here in Hokkaido
and opened this bar
Let's leave
No
We can't leave now
It wouldn't be polite
See how friendly they are?
Have a drink
What would you like?
No more sake
A whiskey
How about Windsor whiskey?
Fine
A bottle of Whiskey, please
Right away
With ice, but no green tea
Fooled us with a forty-year-old photo
Very funny
Come in
A beautiful woman
Bottoms up
This is an inspirational song
Why are your voices so full of despair?
Added together, those four sisters
are more than three hundred years old
How could we not despair?
You take your girlfriend on a trip
But you sneak out drinking
and don't come home
What kind of romance is that?
You call that faithful?
It's called paying her back in her own coin
I allow your heart to love another man
but my body can't enjoy a little fling?
You're shameless
If you let go of the past and be mine
I swear:
even if we were with Maggie Cheung
plus
Angelina Jolie
plus Sophie Marceau and supermodel Chi-Ling Lin
I wouldn't drink a single cup
That's right
You'd drink the whole bar
Feel to see if he has a fever
He's starting to talk crazy
Oh, my
Poor thing
Reality was so distant from your expectations
Should I find you a psychologist?
No medicine can heal my wounded heart
You're my best medicine
Not afraid I'm poison?
I'd drink you, even if you were
Someone tormented you
Now, you torment me
That's the wheel of fate
Bad karma
Hey
We passed this several times
but I didn't say anything
Is it a church? Why so small?
It's for confessions
Confessions?
A lot of city people feel guilty about
all the bad things they've done
So, they come to Hokkaido to confess
Get the guilt out
and seek forgiveness
You must have a lot of sins
Do a good confession
Clear your conscience and start over
Go in
They can't speak Chinese, anyway
You can tell them everything you've done
Better than keeping it inside and having nightmares
Go ahead
God is more forgiving than the police
We won't listen
We'll wait here for you
He's in your hands
Okay
Wu Sang
Sure he can't speak Chinese?
Don't worry. Even if he did
he's not going to broadcast it
Please, begin
I want to donate 10 million. You want it?
Do you speak English?
That's ten times a million. A lot
No English
Don't want any money?
You really don't understand
Now, I can relax
Let me start from the bad things I did
in kindergarten
He really is a lot of fun
He hasn't changed in all these years
Just like he used to be
These past few days together
brought back many good memories
He's a good man
And quite romantic
A head full of impractical ideas
Deep down
He's an idealist
That's why he's still a bachelor
Marriage is about destiny
Sometimes it's just not meant to be
It's fate
He really likes you
Most women don't understand him
I think you do
I hope it works out with you two
Did he tell you about his invention?
It's very interesting
Made him a chunk of money too
I don't know much about him
But he felt like an old friend
My intuition told me that
he's a man I can rely on
If I'm going to get married, but
can't be with the man I love
I should at least find a buddy
If that's what you're thinking
I advise you to let him go
Wouldn't be fair to him
I haven't lied to him
He accepts it
Smiley
I don't know what kind of man
you really want to love
Does he deserve it more than Qin Fen?
You're being very selfish
You can't exploit other people's feelings
I hope I'm not being too direct
That's okay
I like straight-talkers
And then there was this time
we were studying farm production
all in the same dorm
Me
Little Wen
Zhang Kui, Lu Dewei
And also...
Oh, anyhow, there were eight or nine of us
And then, um
It was night time
I got this idea
The idea was, uh
We rubbed balm on the soles of his feet
Then waved a fan over them
As soon as we did
Zhang Kui wet his bed
His blanket and sheets were soaked
It really cracked us up
We didn't admit who did it
But later
the next morning, he discovered
that everything was wet
He didn't dare hang them out
He asked, How'd I pee myself?
Nobody said anything
Then somebody sold me out
Said I did it
I said, I would never do that
Excuse me
The time. It's very late
I'm just getting started
After middle-school, I have countryside stories
Then my career
And love life
Just getting started
I said
I'm not that kind of person
I said, Little Wen did it
Little Wen said
he said he didn't do it
He said I did it
No way. I'd never do that
It was Lu Dewei and them
They did it
Me? Even if it were possible
I'm not saying it wasn't my idea, but...
Miss
Miss, excuse me
Yes?
What's wrong?
Your friend is extremely pious
But he has far too many sins
We're a small church
We don't have enough room
Nearby is a much bigger church
So, please be so kind and
take him there for confession
So sorry
I'll get him out right away
Very sorry
God
please forgive his sins
I was young. Didn't know any better
Felt I'd really wronged her
But now that I think of it...
Cut it out. Let's go
Would even let me bow to her
Hey, Qin Fen
How many sins do you have?
The kind even Hell wouldn't let you in for?
Water... Give me water
Lord
please forgive his atrocities
The Lord sent you to save my soul
and rescue me from Hell
Don't let Him down
I'm still in a world of suffering
Who will save me?
I will
That's hot
I hear this place has lots of bears
That's right
Anyone get hurt?
Yes
Bears seem clumsy
But when they attack
They're very fast
Faster than a deer
Smiley
Smiley. Come back
Watch out for bears
Seeing a bear is good luck for you
Nonsense. It's the bear's good luck
You see any? Where?
C'mon, let's go
You really worried?
If you got hurt, how would I explain it?
To whom?
No one cares about me
I do
Wu Sang
Ask if they've seen any bears
What did they say?
They were a party of four
Now there's only two left
Huh?
How could there be bears here?
Impossible
We fooled you
You really believed us
Who says Japanese aren't funny?
A bunch of real jokers
The bear is coming
Protect your head and heart
If the bear flips you over
flip back to your original position
So pretty
A terrible pity to eat you
Best keep you alive to mother cubs
You don't have bear eyes
What are they?
The eyes of a wolf
Regret meeting me?
No. I'm quite happy
If you'll marry me
our days will be sweet as honey
Would you really marry me?
If you say yes
We can tie the knot tonight
Such a big, bad bear
He said, Don't talk to bears
They'll tear you to pieces
I was torn apart long ago
Cold?
Let's go back
I'll light it for you
I want to do it for you
Do you want me?
Yes
I'm yours tonight
Just for tonight?
Yes
Then I'd rather not have you
Why not?
Don't you think I'm pretty?
I want to repay you
I can't owe you this favor
I won't be able to pay it back
You don't have to
You deserve it
Let me be a fool this once
I'm in love with you
Will you marry me?
Uh
Don't just say, "uh"
I want you to say
Yes or no?
Yes
When?
I need more time
How long?
Qin Fen
The last few days, I've watched myself
through Wu Sang's eyes
I'm such a strange woman
Came all this way with you
but just kept pushing you away
But you understand how I got here
I keep struggling to rescue myself
from an abyss of despair
I hoped that your kindness
and pristine Hokkaido
could help me rediscover life's beauty
That was my selfish hope
But terrible love has already emptied me
The more I struggle
the more the memories pull me down
This evening
in the last sunset of my life
I saw the more lovely side of you
I also saw how pathetic and helpless I was
You are the perfect partner
If I'd only met you years ago
I'm a fool to let you pass me by
But this is God's punishment of me
Good-bye, Qin Fen
Don't look for me
Just please forgive me
After Smiley jumped
she was found by a fishing boat
They rescued her
She's in surgery right now
So damned foolish
Now matter what happens, I'll be there for her
You really are naughty
I thought I was trouble
But you're worse than me
Your brother knows you've been hurt
But with your brother here
you can overcome anything
Okay
I'm leaving
Alright
Otherwise, you'll lose your job
Be good to her
She's a good girl with a true heart
She's already died once
Her love for him is dead now too
This is for your wife and kids
More than ten years since we last met
Who knows when we'll meet again
She's going to need money now
Don't pull that polite crap with me
Money means nothing to me
What I lack are friends
My best friends are scattered to the winds
Sometimes, I really miss you guys
I feel terribly lonely
Take care
It's almost New Year's
You cheated death
So, make a wish
Give me your phone
Hello?
It's me
It's been a long time
I just want to thank you
for once having loved me
I'm very happy now
Because I've found someone
I want to share my life with
Be good to your wife
I wish you both the best
Good-bye
That was my phone
Your phone sleeps with the fishes
You don't need to call anyone else
Understood
The root of the world's endless wars
and escalating conflicts
is our inability to judge disputes impartially
The Conflict Resolution Terminal
wipes out both flaws
Please insert your hand
Okay
Now, grab this handle
Rock, paper, scissors
When I count to three
we both pull it open
One
Two
Three
Interesting
Did you sell that to him?
Isn't that your invention?
You two are venture capitalists
I have my own humble opinion
about the nature of investment
Venture capital is about risk
The greater the risk, the more one invests
No risk, no investment
I'll stake my reputation in saying
to invest in this product
is way too risky
Very suitable for venture capitalists
This will be a massive hi-tech IPO
A revolutionary product
Let's play each other with it
If I win
throw it into the ocean for me
Is that you?
Who else could it be?
Why's you hair all grey?
The worst financial crisis of the century
wiped me out
This year's economy
is really in the dumps
Three top investment banks belly up
Nothing's selling
Don't cry
It's gonna be okay
Don't cry
Listen
I sold this to you, right?
Uh
Right?
Right
I'll buy it back
Name your price
Two million
But you were throwing it away
One million
Two million
One million
Let's not argue
A million, it is
Deal
I meant Sterling
Huh. I meant Japanese Yen
Japanese Yen?
Uh
Don't worry. Next year
when the economy rebounds
I'll sell it at a high price
I'll split it with you
Let me see. What are you looking at?
The future
Our wedding toast
Such beautiful delusions
Like sweet sugar cubes
Jumping into bitter coffee
Words I thought were true
Tears were all I knew
There's no going back now
Just waking up to get drunk again